I Will Come to You
“…I will come to you.” ~ Jesus in John 14:18
I’m starting this new year needing to go back to first things.
As I write this devotional, I’m sitting in my hotel room in Miami, overlooking the water (Cam has a conference in the early part of each year that I’m asked to attend). The sun is shining through my window that spans the height and length of my hotel room. And it feels so good, like all is right with the world. My heart is lifting. Circumstantial? Perhaps. But I’ll take the lifts when they come without overthinking it. It goes back to my word for the year: release.
My heart has carried heavy loads over the last few months and, frankly, I need to be kind to myself.
With some damage to my voice resulting in extra care and months of no singing; the work of living into a clear calling resulting in building a ministry from the ground up; and my David’s diagnosis—oh, my David’s diagnosis of stage 3c colon cancer, and now, within a month of wrapping up the treatment for that, finding more cancer on his liver—well, it’s been… heavy.
Of course, there have been plenty of good times and joy, but the loads have been taking their toll on me.
So, here in Miami, I’m going back to first things.
When I was a little girl, I got separated from my mother at Ontario Place. Ontario Place was one of these terrifically fun, happy places akin to amusement parks, but better. It was right on Lake Ontario in downtown Toronto, a gorgeous location.
I loved Ontario Place. I was happy and free there. And Ontario Place was a bit of a jungle land! There were plenty of large trees and hilly terrain to cover. Plenty of winding ways, dark corners, buildings and structures. And plenty of interesting things to do—so much to do! But, during one summer’s visit, bustling along through the heat and the crowds, I somehow lost my way. So as wonderful as it was, it quickly became utterly overwhelming for this eight-year-old, separated from her mom.
I remembered my mother’s instructions: “If you ever get separated from me, stop where you are. Wait, and I’ll find you.”
"You’ll feel like you want to run, to take matters into your own hands. You’ll look, and look and in your panic, look some more. Your frightened little feet will carry you in every direction and you’ll become exhausted and hopeless. But don’t do that. Sit down. And wait for me to come to you.”
Oh, the relief when that beautiful mother of mine showed up that day. She knelt down, lifted my gaze to her welcoming, relieved face, then took me in her arms.
“I’ve got you, sweetie.”
And here sitting in the heaviness of life, with the touch of sun through my Miami window, I remember first things:
God comes to us. Wherever we are, He is.
Whatever we’re in or running away from. Stop. Sit down and wait. God will come.
I’m real because God is so real.
~ Nancy
CALLING
Is there a place in your life where you just keep moving, but it feels like it’s a frantic or unfocused determination to fix something? Maybe it’s your relationship with your sibling, spouse, or God. Your work, ministry, or self. Sit a while in that realization or curiosity. Allow God to come to you.