My Word for 2020: Release

“You keep [her] in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because [s]he trusts in you.” - Isaiah 26:3

Does God ever give you a specific word—not a sentence or concept or truth, but a specific, literal word?

I don’t get a word from God every year, but sometimes I do. For the last couple of years, I believe God gave me the word “steady”. And I kept that word before me until…

This year.

I mentioned in my last devotional, that God spoke the word “release” to me. Not in an audible voice, but as strong impression that this out of the blue word was mine, specifically meant for me. “Release” is a word that made sense with all that’s going on in my life, and the reality of who I am, and who God is in this life.

Release.

But what does that mean?

I taught voice for 14 years. I had over 30 private students in my voice studio. And I absolutely loved it! To those with singing experience but needing guidance around technique, I would often hold up my hand and make a fist.

“Over the years, you’ve developed a technique that works for you,” I’d say. “And between shallow or blocked breath, tongue and mouth tension, it’s like you’ve made your voice into a nice, tight fist. You hold your voice like I’m holding my fist. It’s bound and tight, but you don’t even notice because it works okay. And it feels normal to you,” I’d explain.

Then I’d show them what I was doing through breathing, body and vocal exercises and the right repertoire. I would slowly start to open up my fist, one finger at a time. I’d show the fingers slowly opening.

“You’re not always going to like it,” I’d say. “You’re going to want to go back to the old way because the new way takes healthy discipline, and it will feel awkward and uncomfortable at times. The old way is what you know and it’s comfortable and works pretty well. But if you trust me, we’ll keep loosening the grip, prying those fingers open, one by one, ‘til they’re open, and agile, flexible and free.” I’d show my hand fully open, fingers bending and wiggling, but open.

“If you trust me and do the work, in a few months, you won’t believe you ever got a sound out the old way. Your voice will begin to bloom. And you’ll be off!”

It’s amazing all the things we latch onto, grip and grind, and somehow, with all kinds of baggage (thoughts, faulty theologies, embedded hypotheses, and ways to be), that we still manage to function.

God wants to release us. And He will, by getting us to release to Him our hold on the concerns and fears of this life.

I understand release when it comes to a voice. You let go of the body (sometimes even deliberately collapsing the upper body, or dropping the knees, or opening the arms wide). You release the breath. Take it in, yes, then exhale. Never hold it when singing! You release the mind. You release the voice.

Here’s what I’m releasing to God, just today:

• My son, David’s health and future

• Gender equality

• This ministry

• My voice

• The Church

I’m not in charge. I’m not in control. I can’t hold on (sometimes for dear life) but must release any hold I have on any of these things.

I’m real because God is so real.

~ Nancy

CALLING

Sit before God and ask Him: What am I holding onto, other than you that you’d like me to release to you? Sit with your hands in your lap, palms up, utterly open to God. (It’s like a trust game, but it’s not funny. It’s very real.)