Our Team Reflects on Motherhood
Meet the mothers on our team!
This Mother’s Day, I thought it would be nice to introduce you to the moms on our team and ask a couple of questions regarding motherhood.
Here’s what they said…
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Carolyn Robbins
Director Human Resources/Community Engagement
Q. How many children and what are their ages?
A. My husband and I have 3 daughters, ages 29, 24 and 21.
Q. What is one thing you wish you knew long ago?
The value ofsavoring the moment. I remember starting my parenting journey and older moms would say, “Savor the moment, it goes by so quickly.” I remember thinking, Yes, but…all I am doing is changing diapers and feeding every 2 hours. Then we entered the “treadmill stage” of activities and school. Middle school was a roller coaster, high school years flew by, and they are in college!
I think back: Did I savor our time together? Was I present in each season of each daughter? Did I love each daughter as their unique selves? Did I embrace each developmental stage?
Now, I am learning to savor where they are now and to treasure new-found time with my husband. The word “spontaneity” has re-entered our vocabulary!
Q. What is the best “mother” advice you were ever given?
Allow your children to fail. Learning how to fail well is a gateway to resilience, problem solving, independence and a healthy sense of self. I have to admit this was and continues to be incredibly hard! So often my husband and I wanted to “step in” to “fix” and to protect our daughters from pain. I remember vividly watching one daughter forget her lines in a 3rd grade event, the tears that streamed after a bad grade, the great disappointment of not making the team or of a college rejection. It is hard to watch your children fall down.
But as we learned how to listen intently and compassionately to the hurt, dismay and anxiety and then to gently guide them to problem solve, be creative and to think differently, we saw growth and creativity and a sense of independence. Remembering the multiple struggles and seeing where our daughters are now, this advice continues to be the best and hardest we received.
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Leslie Eichhorn
Assistant to Nancy/Writer
Q. How many children and what are their ages?
My husband and I have 3 children: our oldest is 8 and we have 6-year-old twins. Life is never dull.
Q. What is one thing you wish you knew long ago?
That parenthood would be NOTHING like I expected. I credit that expectation to friends and family who were good at it and made it look easy. Then I became a parent and thought, “Wait, I didn’t sign up for THIS!” So much of my journey to motherhood did not go as planned - infertility, premature births, medical issues. Now I know unexpected twists are an everyday part of parenthood, from large concerns like an unexpected diagnosis or financial difficulties, to small problems like one child painting with toothpaste on their bedroom wall or sucking out a Cheerio that’s stuck in their nose (true stories). Learning to pivot has become a survival skill!
Q. What is the best “mother” advice you were ever given?
My friend Leah told me she always tells her children not just, “I love you,” but: “I love you for always and always, forever and ever, no matter what.” There is so much grace and mercy in that statement! I try to say that to my kids each day, especially after a day of sibling rivalry or they blame the dog for something naughty they’ve done. I want my love to be a reflection of God’s unending, unfailing love for them, especially when I have a hard time reflecting that love myself.
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Julie Lim
Finance
Q. How many children and what are their ages?
A. I have 2 boys, aged 17 and 15.
Q. What is one thing you wish you knew long ago?
A. Just like life is a journey, so is being a mom. My life has not turned out like I had planned AND it is ok. Up and downs, peaks and valleys. I have seen it all, AND it’s ok. The same is true with our kids. Some days, some weeks, some years are better than others, AND it’s ok. Sometimes you might need to call someone for help for your kids, AND that, too, is ok.
Don’t compare your family life to what your friends are posting on Facebook. I guarantee there is more happening behind the scenes that isn’t getting posted. Just keep going. Most of the things will pass in time. And God can redeem even those bigger things. It just might take a while.
Q. What is the best “mother” advice you were ever given?
A. I am struggling with this question! We haven’t had the best time of it. And there is lots of advice I have been given that hasn’t really helped. But I know this: you will want a relationship with your kids. Don’t let things be a wedge between you and them. Love them no matter what. Blue hair, piercings, tattoos, car wrecks, leaving the church, bad grades, fist fights, bad judgment, forgotten chores, gender identity issues, etc. The list is endless. Keep your relationship with them a top priority.
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Megan Boselli
Marketing
Q. How many children and what are their ages?
A. We have 3 children: Our daughter is 11, our middle son is 10 and our baby boy is 19 months.
Q. What is one thing you wish you knew long ago?
A. That it is WAY more important to “show” versus “tell” when it comes to parenting. When we consistently demonstrate the behaviors we want for our children, they are likely to get onboard as opposed to times when we’ve simply explained again and again. So if I want my kids not to fight with each other and be caring and loving individuals, keeping a cool head and a positive attitude myself is critical.
Q. What is the best “mother” advice you were ever given?
A. Let the kids get messy! As a recovering neat freak, this is a challenge for me. It’s important to let the kids get messy and learn versus limiting their exploration in the world around them. This applies to younger AND older kids. I’ve learned to not only let them get messy - like putting rain boots on and jumping in mud puddles - but to join them, because this is where the best memories are made!
As they grow, I’m finding the “mess” is more metaphoric for the difficult friend or the homework bind they got themselves into, but letting them try, possibly fail, and being there with them as they get back up again.
From us at NancyHicksLive to you, dear mother: Peace and strength and joy be yours in abundance,
~ Nancy & Team