Anxious Thoughts
Today’s devotional is written by Leslie Eichhorn, a team member at Nancy Hicks Live.
“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.” Psalm 139:23
I have struggled with anxiety since I was young and lacked the words to express what I was feeling. It tends to rear its ugly head during major life changes – getting married, becoming a mother, and most recently, adopting a dog (I kid you not!).
2020 was not kind to my anxiety-ridden mind.
On top of the regular stream of mental to-do lists, “don’t forget to” reminders, random thoughts and worries, I had these irrational, unhelpful feelings/thoughts I couldn’t turn off. And they were wreaking havoc on my physical health, too – I had a mild case of shingles over the summer and an unexplained breast infection in the fall. Fun times!
After acknowledging my struggles to my husband and trusted friends, I took their advice and scheduled time with my doctor.
In addition to spiritual practice like reading scripture and praying, we came up with a game plan to reinforce the rest my mind, body and soul needed:
1) EXERCISE: While it seems counter-intuitive, exercise shuts down my brain. I watched yoga videos on YouTube and learned to control my breathing. I began running in small increments, then started going for longer runs as I built up endurance. I focused on the rhythm of my feet connecting with the road. It was soothing. My mind was too tired to be anxious after that!
2) COUNSELING: I was encouraged to do a few sessions to figure out WHY major life changes are a trigger for me. My counselor can also help me come up with strategies to help me manage the anxiety. Sign me up!
3) ACTUAL MENTAL REST: Sometimes I calm the anxiety and settle my mind with a nap (my favorite type of exercise!). Other days it’s curling up with a blanket and a book. I put my phone on Sleep Mode for an hour. I listen to soothing music and pray. Sometimes I just stare out our living room window into the forest behind our house and listen. It’s so hard to get quiet time in our house with three little kids running around and no volume control. So I ask them to spend quiet time in their rooms in the afternoons (emphasis on the QUIET part). It’s for them and for me.
This mental rest is not weakness. It acknowledges limits. It causes us to stop and reflect, to see things we may not otherwise see. We can listen to God, hear his whisper over the din of our everyday lives.
I know I’d rather hear His voice than, “Mom…MOM…MOOOOOOOOOM!!!” any day of the week.